Making amends

What some people may see as baby steps, actually feel more like ginormous bounds for me. I took action today on two relationships that I have been neglecting.

First, I changed my behavior towards my husband. Now I know that neither of us is perfect, even though I often have the mindset that I am smarter, more efficient, and generally 'better' than he is. It's a terrible feeling, but I know that it's up to me to change. I read Dr. Laura's book about marriage. I'm not sure what prompted me to get that book. I don't agree with all of her convictions, but I think there is enough common ground that makes me willing to put her philosophy of nurturing marriage into practice. Instead of pouting and whining that Frank doesn't hug me enough or show his affection the way I want him to, I go up to him and give him a kiss or ask for a hug. In a 'golden rule' twist, I treat him the way he wants to be treated, not the way I want to be treated. Anyway. More on this another time. But truly, it's working.

I reached out to my long-lost best friend by sending her an email today. She and I used to write to each other every single day. Since the births of our children, we've both been busier than ever in our lives. The writing habit fell by the wayside, and before I realized it, we had a huge distance between us. I miss her terribly. I miss living close to her. When I really sit and think about it, I can very quickly get into a funk. A lot of things have changed in my life over the last 5 years, and as much as I sometimes wish to go back to the way things were, I can't. At least not right now. Anyway. When her email response came back this afternoon, it made me so happy. I love being in touch with her again, and the bitter twinge of sadness about missing out on her life for the last few months is motivation enough to make me find time to be a friend again.

So two big steps for one day. I'll call it a good day.